Step 1: Peel yourself out of bed at the ass crack of dawn (or noon if you’re me) on New Year’s Day. Nevermind that you just survived the biggest party night of the year the night before. Oh yeah, make sure you’re in Philadelphia.
Step 2: Whatever you do, take public transportation! Head to Center City on the El and jump off at City Hall. Be prepared to be bombarded by drunks everywhere.
Step 3: Find a good parade spot. You’ll notice the parade works its way down Broad Street, but the Mummer’s brigades only perform at certain spots, usually where all the crowds are.
Step 4: Scope out a liquor store and stock up on some beers. Start drinking out a brown paper bag in the street. Give yourself a pat on the back for starting the New Year off right.
Step 5: After you find your spot, dance drunkenly to the string bands, the wild costumes and the outrageously, over-the-top broadway-esque Mummer productions. And most importantly, wish everyone you see a Happy New Year!